Rain and Snow

Hmm, belakangan ini lagi hujan terus di Singapore, walaupun kalau siang2 panas terik ga ketulungan. But I love rain.

This morning, when I woke up, langit udah agak gelap, but still I determined to go to school to prepare my exam, karena di kamar pasti banyak gejenya. Ga lama kemudian, hujan turun waktu saya lagi jalan ke library. Saya ga bawa payung, jadi yah so be it. Biarin deh kehujanan. Saya seneng hujan, saya suka suara hujan, saya suka bau hujan, I simply love rain. Saya ngeliatin titik air di kaca mobil, saya ngeliatin titik air di daun2, wah senengnya jadi air. Bisa kemana aja yang dia mau, mau nempel bisa, mau bosen tinggal jatoh ke tanah, kalo kangen ama langit bisa naik lagi ke atas (geje amat). But I do envy it. There are times when I want to stick to something/someone/somewhere. There are times when I want to move away from it without feeling guilty, and there are times when I want to go back to something/someone/somewhere with such a trust that it/he/she will accept me. I know itu ga adil buat orang lain, seenak saya mau gimana. Tapi ya kadang2 pengen gitu juga.

Udah seminggu *kejadian* itu berlalu. Kejadian yang taught me a lot of things. I think now is the time for me to find out what/who I really am. What am I going to do with my life in the future with/without him. Sadness period is over, I hope. To see the world as a loving place to live in with loving people around me.

I said I would quit, I take it back. I am strong, and now I am stronger.

Snow..I dream of playing with snow. I want to know how cold it is. Is it as cold as my heart now??

Prayer Journal Day 1

I thank you for the beautiful day today, so that I can study with calm and peace heart. Thank you for the amazing friends around me who always be there for me, to support me, to accompany me during my lunch and my dinner and throughout the day, even though they are busy preparing their exams, still they are ready whenever I call them. Thank you for my family who always brighten my days with their SMS ^^ Thank you for the grace of community that I can pray together with them. Thank you for the sunshine so that my laundry can dry fastly. Thank you for the food. Thank you for the strength and perseverence in my study. Even though it is not effective enough, still it couldn't be better. Thank you Lord...thank you...

Books in my shelves...waiting to be read soon :)

- Match Made in Heaven by Bob Mitchell

The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger - (bakal ada filmnya loh ini..)

- Carry Me Down by MJ Hyland

- The Secret by Rhonda Byrne (ada filmnya juga)

Laskar Pelangi by Andrea Hirata (asli Indo nih :) )

Love is the greatest of al risks

This is from my friend's blog (dhika). I just want to share this to all of you and of course I want to post this because it touched me so much ;)

There is a risk involved in everything.
Every time you share a smile,
Every time you shed a tear,
You are opening yourself up to hurt.

Some people tread slowly through life,
Avoiding the closeness risk brings,
Sidestepping the things they can't understand,
Turning away from those who care too much,
Those who care too long,
Those who hold too tightly.

There is never an easy way to love.
You cannot approach it cautiously.
It will not wait for you to arm yourself.
It does not care if you turn away.
It is everywhere, it is everything.

Love is the greatest of all risks.
It is not reliable, it is not cautious,
It is not sympathetic.
It is unprejudiced and unmerciful.
It strikes the strongest of mind.
And brings them to their knees in one blow.



Even in the best of times, love hurts.
It hurts to need, it hurts to belong,
It hurts to be the other part of someone else,
Without either of your consent,
But, from the moment it overtakes you,
It hurts worse to be alone.

I lost my handphone, nearly lose my sense...

Kyaaaaaaaaaaaa......I lost my handphone. Dun ask how come. I am tired of asking myself the same question. T.T Dunno wad happened to me recently.

I am worried about my quizzes, extra prayers for me please. Hux...

Anyway, I am going home this Friday. Hope I can gain more power there...

*pelitnya gue bikin gue tambah stressssss...keluar duit udah kaya air terjun...

I need a break...

I just read The Nanyang Chronicle, and found a very interesting lines, which apply to me at the very moment. It is said in the column by the editors. Allow me to quote from that :

"In school, too many things happen in such a short time and it seems increasingly difficult to keep up with changes. We have schoolwork, endless deadlines and relationship to maintain. When we get so caught up with all these responsibilities, we may forget that perhaps, all we need is a break from the buzz of life" - Peh Kai Ru, layout editor

And yes, it is really ME. wewwwwwwww...schoolwork, deadlines, ECA commitments (not ECA but CSA, because I only serve CSA for this year), and also relationship that I need to maintain. They are very difficult for me to cope with. I am just...too...tired.

I am tired, really. I need a break. One or two days will do. I know that maybe people will call me manja lah, homesick-an lah, but I dun care. I am homesick...I miss my beloved ones back home...I need to stop for a while in order to step ahead. Pray for me, please ^^

Menunggu datangnya hari itu...

Kadang kalau saya ditanya, paling ga suka ngapain? Jawaban saya satu, nunggu. Saya tau kadang kita ga bisa menghidari untuk menunggu. Ada saatnya kita menunggu, ada saatnya juga kita ditunggu. Hmmm...

Waiting..seems to be the hardest work ever. It does not require much energy, but it absorbs almost all of it. I am waiting till the day I come back home. To see you again...kayanya baru aja 2 bulan ga ketemu, rasanya makin berat aja ya . Saya ga tau apakah saya ini pihak yang ditunggu atau menunggu. He3. Apalagi kalo saya mikir, abis kuliah di Singapore, saya mau ngapain. Saya masih kepingin banyaaaaaaaaaaak sekali, tapi apa saya itu berarti saya harus meninggalkan orang2 yang saya sayang, keluarga dan tentu aja...kamu...

Sooooo...I guess, what I can do now, is only waiting. Waiting till the day comes. December will not be that long. To meet you, to see you, to find what I almost lose..