I was blessed and I am still blessed :)

Fuuhhhh, akhirnya saya mulai tenang, I mean ga cuma tenang sih, I am much more better than yesterday. Setelah renungan malam, saya somehow disadarkan, how small my problems are compared to others'. Last night, I was urged to open one of my book, given by my bestfriend, titled Love Letter from God. Ada satu kalimat yang bener2 bikin saya bangun dari tidur.

"...sekali-kali manusia bisa terluka. Dulu pun kamu pernah terluka, tapi luka itu tidak mengalahkanmu. Dan sekarang, kamu terluka dan yakinlah luka itu tidak akan mengalahkanmu. Kalau kamu coba pikir kembali, persoalan kamu itu sangat amat kecil dibanding persoalan yang mungkin menimpa orang lain. Kekalahan itu disebabkan bukan karena kamu tidak bisa menghadapi suatu persoalan, tapi kamu kalah karena kamu percaya bahwa kamu akan kalah..."

So, iya nih, jadi malu sendiri. cuma masalah laptop rusak dan persoalan2 kecil lain bikin saya super bete. ga pantes ah. hahaha... harus dihadapi dengan berani, optimis, dan penuh iman :). Semua pasti ada jalan keluar, pasti ada akhirnya. Kalo emang harus beli laptop lagi, ya sudah, nanti nabung lagi buat ganti uang ke ortu. moga2 masih cukup rejeki buat cari laptop sederhana. lagian saya ga pake laptop buat macem2 amat, asal bisa buat buka email ama chatting lah. hahahah oh iya, sama buat kerjain FYP. hehehehe

Kemaren sempet merasa sendirian banget, biasanya ada si ***** yang jadi tempat sampah ya. saya nahan diri banget2 biar ga sms dia. hehehe. takut kebawa emosi sesaat. And guess what, when I prayed, I was really comforted :). He never leaves me :) And He sent a lot of people actually to accompany me. argh senangnyaaaa....

oke deh, so hari baru, semangat baru :) I was blessed and I am still blessed. Thanks God :)

Ma, Pa, I am coming home ^^

A Series of Unfortunate Events

Hush, I know that complaining will neither give me any help, nor solving all the problems. But sometimes it's just necessary to spill out things, to comfort one's heart. Fuuuhhhh, these last 2 weeks have been miserably miserable. fuuuuh

1. I almost lost SGD$300 for the wrong flight ticket

2. I did stupid mistake during Structures 3 quiz yesterday

3. I accidentally spilled a glass of water onto my laptop last night. haiz...

I am too tired of all of these. Think that I should evaluate what went wrong. Evaluate myself. Focus on study and be more careful. Lord, help me...

About voluntary work

hmmm Have I ever mentioned that I really do want to join any voluntary work/mission trip? yeah, actually since last semester I found it interesting and meaningful to join that kind of activity. I mean, you know, I love travelling. But I felt that travelling just for fun is not exactly what I wanted. I want to do something meaningful, for myself and for others.

So many times, it came across my mind to join here and there for this mission trip. But always, money is the constraint. I mean, I have money but I feel it's now really wise to spend it just like that, since I haven't earned it myself.

So, I chatted with one friend about mission trip to Nepal. Yes, Nepal. Wew, so exotic and I dun know why, the passion and excitement came once again. It will not be very expensive to live there, the expensive part is only the airflight ticket. I can teach English, help them to paint/build school, etc etc. After the program, I would be able to do trekking to Himalaya (gosh!), and trip to Tibet. Wew... it's very very unique and meaningful, isn't it?

I am disturbed now...

I am living in a crazy world T.T

Yeah, indeed I am living in a crazy world. With people who do not care about the results of their effort to make money. I am sorry for being so racist, oh no, it's not racist by the way. Okay, here, I will just spit my dissapointment of the existence of some crazy people in China. SOME, I said.

I heard from a friend that has been there the last 6 months that they mix cardboard (kardus, I mean) with the meat for making pau. Yeah, daging dicampur kardus. You can't see it from outside, can you? Just watch out, you might eat cardboard T.T

Then, do you know that in China, there are fake eggs. Yeah, FAKE! Can you imagine, how smart they are. How brilliant they are, I must say. I quote from a website : "Xinhua has a report about artificial eggs that were apparently sold by a street vendor in Handan, Hebei Province. The report says that the man who took the eggs home found that the eggs' yolk and white were all mixed up, and di not have any flavor. After inspection by "relevant departments" it was found that the dodgy eggs' shells were made from calcium carbonate while the fake yolks were made from a mixture of gelatine, starch and other chemicals. "

Nice one. And now! They use melamine for milk production for babies. Yes, babies! Oh gosh, how can they even think to harm such innocent babies. I really really do not understand why there are such people... *sigh* . And now I am afraid what this world will be in the next 10 years, what kind of world that my children, my grandchildren will live in.

Belum lagi urusan es batu dari air got di Jakarta, global warming segala, buset deh!

Should I or should I not?

Hmm.. here is the story. One day I read an ad in the Catholic News about the musical that will be held next year by SMOTA. It's called PAUL. you can refer to this website if you want to know more.

Now, the problem is I really want to join the musical, as a cast. I mean, I love acting and singing, I have joined about 3 musical production for these 4 years and I promise myself that I want to do it again when there is a chance. Now, the chance is there but the problem is that I am not sure if I can manage my time well to cope with the practices and all. True that I am not THAT busy currently, since my FYP is still in the starting phase, but who knows how it will be in the next coming months? And, the musical will be on 28 July 2009, which I am still not sure where I am going to be on that day. Graduation trip, hometown, further study in other country? Who knows....

*Yeah, I know I have missed ICN 2008. I initially wanted to join but somehow I could resist myself from joining since at that time I was quite busy with GTD ( I dunno that they will have practice around this time, if I knew, it would be a whole different story). But, never mind I still joined the Choir, so it's kinda paid off. *

Come back to the main issue. Yeah, I will still go to the audition and let us see what's next. I also registered to become the crew member, in case I couldn't get accepted for any cast. I know that I am not THAT good to become an actress or whatsoever, but I do love performing on stage. hahahaha I love being under the spotlight somehow :p

Yeah, sooooo let us see what will happen next. Belum tentu juga saya keterima, udah pusing duluan. hahahaha GR banget :p

what a stupid person i am

hari ini melakukan kesalahan super bodoh

and it costs me SGD $200

ancurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

beli tiket pulang : jakarta - singapoer - jakarta. yeah! Great! I should buy Singapore - Jakarta - Singapore, aren't I? yeah... dun tell me how stupid i am. i know i am.

Crap....